38 Reasons why it's awesome to be a girl

I was thinking before how crappy it is to be a women. I mean we earn less, have that gloop stuff invade our knickers every month, have to go through labour 2.4 times (average numbers of kids per family in England, according to that awful sitcom), we have to carry mace everywhere we go...
Anyway I'm not here to rant. I decided, before i rushed out to book my sex change op, that i would try to think of the good things about my womenhood, you know all that 'my body is a temple stuff'. Here's what i came up with:

1. Women can hug their friends without being called gay.

2. The obvious one: we live longer.

3. Almost all of our problems can be solved with chocolate.

4. Women aren't covered with hair like shag carpeting.

5. We're always the first off a sinking ship, and we usually survive the longest in horror movies.

6. We are NEVER blamed for the water around the toilet bowl.

7. Women never fancy cartoons/computer game protangonists.



8. Women know how to cover up spots and other facial blemishes.

9. If a woman inexplicably vanishes for weeks at a time, one of her friends will most likely realise.

10. Women mature earlier than men (some men never mature at all).

11. We can talk to the more fortunate looking members of the opposite sex without picturing them in the nude.

12. We don't feel uncomfortable with gay waiters or hairdressers. Heck; half of us have Gay Best Friends.



13. A woman can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

14. We can forget to shave, and there is no real issue.

15. A woman can take a drive without trying to beat her best time.

16. Women don't think reading the instruction book is a betrayal of all their species stands for.

17. Women are capable of going longer than five minutes without thinking about either sex or football.

18. We can cry or show cleavage/leg and get off a speeding ticket.

19. We can shop at Victoria's Secret.

20. We always get the bed when we fight with the other half.

21. A woman can get a whole new lease on life just by changing her lipstick.

22. A woman can congratulate her team-mate without ever touching her rear.



23. Women don't have to worry about catching the crown jewels in their zipper.

24. If a woman says something stupid, most men will just think she's cute.

25. We ALWAYS get to choose the movie.

26. PMS is a legal defense for murder

27. We look good in shorts.

28. It's cool to be a daddy's girl. It's sad to be a mummy's boy.

29. We have complete control over our eyebrows.

30. Women can watch one TV channel at a time without getting bored.

31. Women can get drunk quicker and cheaper than men.

32. A woman's friend won't try to persuade her to get a tattoo while she's drunk.

34. A woman won't drive to Hell and back before she asks for directions.

35. Women aren't covered with hair like shag carpeting.

36. Woman don't feel threatened if their partner earns more than they do.

37. For women, a new season means a whole new wardrobe.

38. Women know exactly what buttons to push to get exactly what they want.